Grace for (Chemo) trials

About a month ago I heard from my Oncologist that there was a new Chemotherapy trial coming up at the end of January. Since that time I prayed much for an answer and wisdom to make the right decision, and once I made the decision that God would bless it. At first I was quite sure I would not go back to Chemo treatments. I know how they can wreck havoc in one’s life and body. Yet after more consideration and speaking with my own Christian family doctor I felt I should maybe try it once more.

So often God feels so close and today, as I write this, is again one of those moments. As I started writing for the next blog entry this Grace Gems devotion dropped into my email box. Amazingly on time, I can only see that as a gift from God. I will share it with you.

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 This is a wonderful secret which all of us ought to learn! ( J.R. Miller)

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame!" Hebrews 12:2
"In the morning, O LORD, You will hear my voice. In the morning I will order my prayer to You and look up!" Psalm 5:3

This is a wonderful secret which all of us ought to learn: We should not think so much about the toil and hardness of the way but to look beyond to the brightness of the end! It does not matter how rough the road is if only it brings us HOME at last!

Many of us go worrying all through this life, keeping our eyes always downcast on the path we are treading. We see all the troubles, the difficulties, and discouragements but we never raise our eyes to see the joys and the eternal blessings which are waiting for us. We ought to learn this life secret, which made Christ look past the shame and sorrow of His cross and see the glory beyond. Learn to look up toward Heaven! Think of its joys and its blessedness until earth's trials shall melt away in the brightness, and its grieves and losses are forgotten in the hopes of eternal glory!

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal!" 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

(Notice how this same Bible text also appears on the top of my blog)

"For our citizenship is in Heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. He will transform the body of our humble condition into the likeness of His glorious body!" Philippians 3:20-21
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New Chemotherapy trials specifically for Kidney Cancer don’t come along very often and I will have only a small window of opportunity to be part of this study trial. For instance, I could not be part of this study if I said no first and then changed my mind later. However, I can drop out at any time. If the treatments would take me to a level that made me very ill and quality of life would deteriorate to a level where I would be very ill most of the time, I would then cancel out and quit.

After I made this decision last week to participate in this trial I received notice that another option  may be available. I received the following notice from the Cancer research centre in Vancouver.
 

” We have another study that has been ongoing here for quite a while (3 years). It is a Phase I study. Recently the study sponsor has identified that Kidney Cancer may be responding to this treatment, if a specific protein is found on the tumour cells called ‘Met’. They are now requesting that ONLY Kidney Cancer patients be enrolled into this study, where before we were treating people with all different types of cancers. We would need to request a sample of your previous biopsy/surgery to send away to be tested for this protein. If your cancer cells do contain this Met protein, you would be eligible to receive this treatment."

Now I have a choice of 2 trials and I will leave this with a peaceful heart in Gods capable “Hands” He knows what is best and which trial I will be part of, test will reveal it all. Please join us in prayer that God will bless the one that He will want me to start.

I still feel good with some pain in my left hip and discomfort in my back. Before I start any treatments there will be a number of tests conducted prior to Chemo treatments, they including a CT scan, a bone scan, complete eye exam, series of blood tests and an ECG. Either one of these Chemo trials should start sometime in February, giving me some time to ready myself prayerfully and mentally.
 

I thank you again for all the kind emails, messages, phone calls and visits and most of all your prayers. God is an amazing God. As I walk this road of cancer I am so thankful for the abundant Grace in trials. I am praying more and more that God will bless you too, the readers of this blog. We all need God daily and heart renewing Grace each day . God bless you and keep you.
John

God hath not promised skies always blue,
Flower strewn pathways all our lives through;
God hath not promised sun without rain,
Joy without sorrow, peace without pain.

But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

God hath not promised we shall not know
Toil and temptation, trouble and woe;
He hath not told us we shall not bear
Many a burden, many a care.

God hath not promised smooth roads and wide,
Swift, easy travel, needing no guide;
Never a mountain rocky and steep,
Never a river turbid and deep.
 

Annie J.Flint