2 Cor. 4 16-18

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18







Saturday, 22 June 2013

Thy will be done

Whereas God tests our faith, he never tempts it (James 1:13). The purpose of divine testing is to sanctify and strengthen. The purpose of satanic tempting is to deceive and destroy. Evil neither exists in the heart of God nor is He its author. It most assuredly exists in our hearts and we are its author.
Sam Storms.
 
Testing is never easy, it places a great deal of stress on whatever material is being tested. Last week Thursday morning I was admitted to the hospital due to vomiting and pain, this time is was my body being tested. On Friday during the night I endured such incredible neurological pain in my spine that it literally made me swim in my bed in agony. Having vomited for more than 24 hours no pain medication was left in my body to subdue pain. By the time the medical staff caught up with pain medication it was some 4 hours later and finally I fell asleep exhausted and under the heavy influence of pain medication.
 
It was during the time of extreme pain that I made it known to God in desperation that it would be better for me to be home with my Lord and Saviour than to be here in this valley of pain and tears. Soon after that I fell asleep. When I awoke the pain was nearly gone, subdued by medication I felt much better and was able to thank the Lord for caring for me and giving the gift of medical staff and meds. Strange as it may sound, but I again prayed for healing and Gods nearness because I know and believe that I serve a God that lives and does great miracles, also of healing. For clear evidence of that I suggest you read the New Testament. it is full of healing miracles by Jesus himself. Each time I read of the healing that Jesus did I can’t help but ask for the same knowing that even one word from His mouth, or even one thought can bring about complete healing. 
 
On Sunday I was discharged from the hospital and I looked back at 4 days of great blessings where many opportunities arose for me to speak about Gods Grace to medical staff but also others that visited me and encouraged me a great deal spiritually. Yes it tested my faith, but it strengthened my faith in the furnace of affliction. I know that I was not alone during this time of trial, Jesus was Captain in my little ship and He was navigating so we would not run aground on the rocks of despair.
Being home again is a great blessing, there is no place like it and the care is second to none from the ever presence of Henrietta.
 
On Thursday we visited my Radiation Oncologist to enquire about the added pain in my mid spine. The last CT scan revealed that additional cancer spots are appearing on the spine. After being examined we made the decision with the Oncologist to watch and wait into the next week or so and not to radiate right now. Radiation also has its drawbacks and side effects.
 
The question is often, where do you draw the line. Even with the help of medical professionals these decisions are often difficult to make. Nothing else but God and Him only, He is the One who has all the answers. It is to Him I turn to be a light upon my path and ask the Lord to lead and show the way.
 
Teach me Thy way, O Lord, teach me Thy way!
Thy guiding grace afford, teach me Thy way!
Help me to walk aright, more by faith, less by sight;
Lead me with heavenly light, teach me Thy way!
 
I continue to be on pretty heavy pain meds, something I don’t care for but it is the only way for now to suppress the pain and have a fairly normal life. The tokens of love and care I receive are overwhelming at times. I am deeply indebted to you all for this and thank you from the bottom of my heart.
 
Despite all the thoughts and wishes that so often fill my mind I come back to that perfect prayer that Jesus taught His disciples, especially the words” Thy will be done”. It is those words that give rest to my soul.

Our Father which art in heaven.
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever.
Amen.
 
God be with you all and bless and keep you.
John

4 comments:

  1. Dear John,
    Praising the Lord that you can still Praise Him in the Storm...

    I was sure by now
    God You would have reached down
    And wiped our tears away
    Stepped in and saved the day
    But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

    As the thunder rolls
    I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
    "I'm with you"
    And as Your mercy falls
    I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
    And takes away

    And I'll praise You in this storm
    And I will lift my hands
    For You are who You are
    No matter where I am
    And every tear I've cried
    You hold in Your hand
    You never left my side
    And though my heart is torn
    I will praise You in this storm.

    I remember when
    I stumbled in the wind
    You heard my cry to you
    And you raised me up again
    My strength is almost gone
    How can I carry on
    If I can't find You

    But as the thunder rolls
    I barely hear You whisper through the rain
    "I'm with you"
    And as Your mercy falls
    I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
    And takes away

    And I'll praise You in this storm
    And I will lift my hands
    For You are who You are
    No matter where I am
    And every tear I've cried
    You hold in Your hand
    You never left my side
    And though my heart is torn
    I will praise You in this storm

    I lift my eyes unto the hills
    Where does my help come from?
    My help comes from the Lord
    The Maker of Heaven and Earth!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mr_okB6TPW0

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  2. Dear John,
    These words were an encouragement for me. Not always am I ready to exclaim, "It is far better to leave this world to be with Jesus" because life's business, joys and and my own spiritual apathy takes hold of me. But by the time I was done reading your post, I felt a renewed encouragement to press on and finish the race, however long it may be. Our family regularly prays for you from youngest to oldest :-) May you know God's Fatherly care for you today.

    Love,
    a friend in NJ

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  3. Most comforting are the words of Jesus, just before the Lord's Prayer in Matthew 6:8:
    ...for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.

    Don't worry about the ethical question of what medicine/treatment, how long,...
    Our father will take you in His time and take care of your loved ones. John 14:26-31

    In prayer for you,
    The Brevieres

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  4. ~Dear John~~~you are such an encouragement to us as we read your blog !!! your amazing strength you get from God's word shows us that you are totally relying on God and His wisdom He gives you each day !!so sorry to hear your in so much pain !!our prayers are with you John and Henrietta as you go thru these trials ~I am sure you know the song "Because He Lives I can face tomorrow" and I dedicate that song to you today !!!!God bless you Esther and Harry

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